5 Signs You're In a Toxic Relationship
Look out for these lethal clues.
SHUTTERSTOCK
By Kristin Davin, Psy.D., for YourTango
Most of us can admit to remaining in a toxic relationship well beyond its expiration date. Unfortunately, we often stay in them for many reasons, until we’re eventually able to see the relationship for what it really is—and more importantly, for what it’s not. Look out for these telltale signs that your in an unhealthy relationship:
1. You feel like you can't do anything right. The other person constantly puts you down as not good enough. They mock your personality, and you feel ashamed most of the time. You only feel pardoned when you take on the traits of the person doing the condemning or judging. Belittling makes you feel less than and takes away your power and inner strength.
2. Everything is about your partner—and never about you. Of course you have feelings, too, but your partner won't hear them. You're unable to have a two-sided conversation where your opinion is heard, considered, and respected. Instead of acknowledging your feelings, they battle with you until they get the last word. Toxic partners seldom, if ever, ask about you, and your conversations are one-sided. If you do share, it’s momentary and your partner finds a way to quickly return the conversation back to themselves.
3. You find yourself unable to enjoy good moments with this person. Every day brings another challenge. It seems as though your partner is always raising issues. Their attempt to control your behavior is an attempt to control your happiness. Furthermore, they focus on the negative to keep you in the same state that they are: unhappy and miserable—though they probably won’t admit it.
4. You're uncomfortable being yourself around your partner. You don't feel free to speak your mind. You feel like you have to put on a different face just to be accepted by that person. You realize you don't even recognize yourself anymore, and neither do your closest friends and family.
5. You feel like you’re not allowed to grow and change. Whenever you aim to grow and improve yourself, the other person responds with mockery and disbelief. There is no encouragement or support for your efforts. Instead, they insist that you will never be any different than you are now.
Click HERE to learn more about unhealthy relationships—and find out how to get out of a toxic one—at YourTango.com.
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