📚💛“To you, who hurt me”💛📖

📚💛“To you, who hurt me”💛📖

🍂💛I am writing you this letter to free myself from the pain I let you cause me. 

I write it for me, 

not for you. 

I write to give myself the chance to externalize those wounds that bleed inside me without leaving traces, 

to heal, 

to move on. 

I deserve to feel better, 

that's why I'm writing to you.

And perhaps, 

in the midst of this suffering, 

I could also thank you: 

you showed me clearly what my weak points were. 

Now I know them too, 

I'm more aware of them because they still pulsate, 

and I won't let anyone use them against me again. 

I will make my weaknesses my strengths. 

Every wound that I manage to heal will become my medal. 

It's true, 

I collapsed, but I will get back up stronger than before.

I want to leave all this behind me but I don't want to forget.

I simply want to free myself from the pain, and also from the resentment, 

from the emotional attachment that I have towards you and which hurts me, 

I want to free myself from the fear of loving, 

of failing, 

of not being worth enough. 

I don't want to forget because I don't want to make the same mistake, 

I will turn this pain into a lesson tattooed on my heart.

I understood that I had collapsed, 

that I had reduced myself to dust not because of you, 

but because I had betrayed myself: 

I had abandoned myself to you, 

I had let my heart beat in someone else's chest, 

with the ability to do what I wanted with it. 

he wanted. 

I left the responsibility for my happiness in the wrong hands. 

I betrayed myself and this is perhaps what hurts me the most: 

I ignored the fact that I was the most important person in my life; 

but rest assured that I learned my lesson well… 

“I will never forget myself again.”

I decided to rebuild myself on healthier foundations, 

which truly reflect my feelings and everything I am, 

without being influenced by anyone anymore. 

I want to give myself the chance to be reborn from my ashes and I will treasure this whole story. 

I realized that I had reduced myself to these conditions due to a feeling that I confused with love and whose nature I still struggle to understand. 

Maybe my mind was stuck in an idea of us that didn't correspond to reality and while I was lost in that illusion, 

I let you hurt me, 

sure that it was normal, 

that it was part of the game. 

The only certainty I have for now is that I will never let anyone hurt me like this again. 

I deserve more, 

I'm worth more than this.

“Today is the first day of my second life”

And I want to make it my greatest work of art. 

I realized that I had thrown away too much energy, 

too much time, too many emotions. 

I let my feelings be trampled like dead leaves when they were fragments of me to be handled with care. 

I've wasted too much of my life so far, 

I've wasted it giving importance to the wrong person and not giving it to the right person. 

Now, it is useless to poison oneself with thoughts so dark that they obscure every little joy. 

I have a new life to live, 

a life without you. 

I deserve happiness and I will fight to get it.

The time we have is limited on this earth and I don't want to have any regrets when my time comes to an end. 

I want to live a life worth living, 

which is why today I free myself and free you. 

I don't want to think that everything you are is limited to what you did to me so I let you go. 

Live your life, 

be happy, 

but far away from me. 

I don't wish you the harm you inflicted on me, 

it would be of no use. 

I push you away from me but I warn you:

don't think you can go back hoping that I will turn the other cheek to you, 

because I have learned to protect myself, 

to have respect for myself and allowing someone like you to make fun of me again is an insult to my intelligence that I will not tolerate.

This suffering dragged me into my personal hell and the more I clung to the past, 

the more I suffered, 

uselessly, 

until I lost every glimmer of strength and hope for the future; 

only by letting go I could breathe again, 

only by accepting my defeat, 

my failure, 

and stopping fighting to avoid looking the state I had reduced myself in the face, 

did I understand how much violence I had done to myself. 

I stayed grounded for a while and I don't regret it, 

because it was when I realized I was completely lost that I found myself.

You were a cruel master, 

but I treasured your teachings. 

Now, when I cast an eye on the past, 

only two words resonate inside me with the fury of the truth that is not afraid to pierce the lies as sweet as honey; 

I dedicate these two words to you with all of myself: 

“Never again”!... 

💛💖💗💕💓💘💞💝